i hate taking picture

See?

You get what I mean? I look hideous , is ugly, I look terrible. Well u get the idea right?
That's why you never catch me cam-whore because I HATE having my picture taken.

There are people that are just pure photogenic and look better in picture than the actual self; I m the total opposite of that, I look at least 15.83 times better in real life than the 1 in picture.

Btw, i just wan to show my new haircut, I like it a lot and is cheap as well. Was suppose to put some gel on it till I found out i have not got a gel with me. BOOOO

Alone

When you are all by yourself, you feel alone.

But I feel alone even though I'm in a crowd. Is not like everyone ignored me, I am the one ignoring everybody.

Am i stuck up? Most probably.

Am i feeling sad? No.

Am i a weirdo? Yes, according to Michelle. (lol, we are both weirdo)

I dunno why am I blogging it now at 2.40am, maybe I m just too bored. Or i just doing my routine of sulking.

I watched Cashback yesterday. Ben, the protagonist set me thinking with this line:

MOST PEOPLE GO THROUGH THEIR WHOLE LIFE NOT KNOWING WHAT THEY WANT.

I m not a greedy person, I m happy so long as I lived till 65. So now that I m 21, I actually lived through 1/3 of my life now knowing what I WANT.

That is pathetic right?

I always joke to my friend that my dream is to have a dream someday in my life.

I dun really feel funny after everytime I said it. Haih........... Why am I still saying it then? And wouldn't it be better for me to look for my dream? I dunno.

I'm Damn Lazy

Everyone know that I'm lazy.

In fact, I'm so lazy that sometime I simply lie on the bed and do nothing, not even sleeping, because sleeping means you need to concentrate to shut yourself off from the surrounding. But by doing nothing, I have nothing to do. (wtf?)

We are living in a world where people is putting too much on a piece of paper called CERT. There are quite a few course mate of mine, those who suppose to be excellent because they are academically splendid, actually disappointed me. I thought they can teach me how to be better, and all I have was disappointment with the education system of our country. (some might blame it on the family brought up XD)

This bunch of excellent academic achiever doesn't actually use common sense and logic thinking. Put them in a situation mentioned in the book before, they can handled all the problem fantastically. But once you come out with something slightly different from what the book taught, you will see a bunch of clown hopping around.

R you one of the academically-well-yet-no-common-sense retard?
You are one, if you answer yes to at least 3 of the questions below:

1. You are happy when the question in examination is easier (not to your standard)?
2. You spend 5 hours on how to make you assignment look different from the rest because you are afraid of being accused of plagiarization?
3. You think assignment is god-sent and f**k the test?
4. You think I'm hot? (lol, just to check whether you are reading anot)
   
5. You never listen to people who score 3 grade lower than you?
6. You never actually make decision on your own and you judge your decision by taking account of how many people are on your side?

There, I answer NO to everything except for the FOURTH. So i m not an academic-well-yet-no-common-sense retard, just a vain pot.

BFF?!?!

I only know that BFF stands for Best Friend Forever this morning.

Previously i thought BFF is BEST FEMALE FRIEND.

Or Best Friend's Friend (yeah, I know that's lame)

But worst of all, at one point I actually thought it might be Boy Friend's Friend.


Back to what I intend to talk about, I realized that I never actually had a best friend before. I dun feel sad and is not pathetic btw, is the simple fact that I don't have a best friend.

Best Friend - The one friend who is closest to you. (this is from a lousy web dictionary)

I have a few friends that are close to me but I dun think any1 of them are more close to me than the rest, and I m a stupid person who think that best can only be 1. But it does make sense right? Best is suppose to be having the most positive qualities, so how can it be more than one for most?

I am a person who share most of my feeling and thoughts to anyone around that I am fond of. I think one can only befriend with another that he/she likes. So in my case, most of my friend will know what I m going thro in my mind. It doesn't feel like standing on the stage totally naked, it actually make me feel less stressed because I am able to share.

In my mind, friend are suppose to be someone that share a lot of commonality yet complete the lacking part of you. I'm blessed with very nice friends throughout my life, I may not have lots of friend but friends that I have around are superb and sometimes I feel that I don't deserved it at all. (lol, i know it sounds like the those break-up lines)

Once again, it is proven I'm having more of quality than just plain quantity in my life.

Break

The one week Raya break is almost over, classes will be as usual come this Monday.

Went for house visiting on the third day of Raya (Friday), had tonnes of layer cakes and a very nice beef dish. Every1 is all dressed up and look their best except for me. (i wore a shorts, but is a really nice pair of shorts and is not cheap, FYI)

Didn't do much through out the whole break, at times felt very very bored, but isn't the point of having a break is to relax and take everything slowly?

Joined a 3 days church camp and actually put me into a lot of thinking. Make a few big decision that moment. One of it is to pick up cooking, I want to learn to cook for myself and people around me. I m going to the person who I used to complaint alot bout her cooking (my mom la, hu else?) to actually teach me. But i can't stand the smell of fish, anyone can teach me how to overcome this hurdle?!? XD

P.S: Really like the blogs' skin. No more looking broken.