Motivation and its alter-ego

Motivation? Checked

Single-line test pad? Checked

Calculator? Checked

Full stomach? Checked

Right after the positive tick, came all the negative one.

Hot weather? Checked

Weird smell from the hall? Checked

Semi-functional brain? Checked

Non-stop browsing Facebook? Checked

*No wonder my assignments have yet to be done.

I love taking photo of Be@rbrick

Is quite true that when you are single and alone, the loneliness feeling is not as bad as when you are hanging out with a bunch of mate and each of them have their missus and dude. Feeling of being left out + not having someone to hold on to = super emo all the time.

But is good that when you have friends to hang out with, to cheer you up, to support you when the road ahead is really tough and rough, to share lame jokes with.

With the holiday ending, I'll be back to Sarawak, not having much people to hang out with. With a few group work due-ing soon and final round the corner, I'm so hating October and half of November; but anticipating December anxiously.

At time, i m like the electricuted Be@rbrick.

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Went window shopping with Nick and for the first time in a long long while, I actually sorta hated it. Is has nothing to with Nick, I just don seems to be in the mood.

Am I on the brink of losing my sole passion of my life?
What will become of RC without any shopping?

Resolution

Lately, I found that I can't blog as much as I like using English. As if I can express better with Mandarin suddenly and in exchange I have to give up English. But I wan to blog mainly in English, I wan to show people that YKM's English also boleh tahan I think somehow it will help to improved my English la, so I wan to do it, dun tell me what I can't do, no one knows me better than myself.

How do you actually know that you fall in love with a person?

People say:

• You feel light-headed when she look at you while playfully blinking her eye
• You can't wait to see her again even though you just send her home 5 minutes ago
• You get worry/upset when she is not replying ur msg or sms
• You think that she is cute when she get slightly pissed by your mischievous teasing
• You wan to make her smile even if it deal massive pain to your body and soul

Of coz, there are lot lots more. But I think I had experienced all the situation mentioned above when I m with different gal, does that mean I love every single 1 of them?
I dunno, I'm confused.

Love was suppose to be simple, not confusing.

Love was suppose to be all about shower of happiness, not down pour of tears.

Love was suppose to be doing things together silently, not play guessing.

Love spell L-O-V-E, not T-R-O-U-B-L-E.

Love brings people together, not making close friend wanted to be away from each other.

P.s: Not emo-ing, jus expressing sensitive emotional point-of-view.

dec 2004 - blank - sep 2009

Went out with Yoko/Tommi/the Vios driver yesterday and today. It was a real good experience, this is actually the first time we went out together without any gal around, means we can be ogler for the whole day, and for some reason we pay more attention on Hot Momma. LOL.

I top my record of singing k for 3 hours with just a friend to 4 hours this time. Was enjoying to the max on the first 2 hour, spend the last hour wishing the session could end sooner. Lol.

Took some of the nicest picture ever of mine, and finally feel that maybe I can make a living by modeling? LOL. that is not serious at all, pun very much intended here.

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Finally a more decent meet up of 5s6ers. And it is pretty decent, of coz it will be better if the next day is a holiday, with poker and chips and lots of chilled beer. But is good in the sense we did a lot of catching up, and I m going to graduate before Yuxuan - the foundation expert. Lol.

Looking forward to our next gathering.

if u think is u, then it is u lo

异性间就很难存有纯纯的，超亲密的友情吗？

我对你好，你就先入为主地以为我在追求你? 不要想太多好吗？ 你觉得我配不上你？我都还没有嫌弃你啦，请你不要自个儿地以为自己是优质的，是抢手货。我还是喜欢像puss那样散发着一种独特的味道但自己却又不知道。

我很差吗？我就是地低泥吗？他妈的，老子可是有自己的市场的。身边的朋友其实让我更了解自己，我只是缺乏一点点的自信，我又何必去介意你的眼光，更不需要你给我打分数。

不要误会，我还是很喜欢你的，只是你必须学会不要太自我为中心。

Gerard

Watched The Gamer and The Ugly Truth on Thursday and Friday. Both movie with Gerard Butler as the cast. Not that I m a big fans of muscle beef but these are the only 2 movies I wanted to watch.

I know I love romantic comedy a lot, maybe the reason being I enjoy joke and I don't actually have a love life, watching a love flick is sort of like being in love without needing to deal with all the shit, crap, lies in relationship. WTF? I sound like a grudging old women that have her life saving cheated by a younger boy toy.

I thought of giving action movie a chance to redeem themselves, TKY - my roomie was keep on telling us about how much he wanted to watch it, so i thought it must be good eh.

I can't stop laughing watching one movie and can't stop shaking my head in another 1, needless to say, you know which one I enjoyed and which one I hated it.

I watched District 9 on laptop, is not as bad or as good as people have been telling me. But if you put it side by side with the movie I watched on Thursday, you will simply love District 9.

Oh, BTW, I watch the movies in the newly open MBO cinema in the Spring, Kuching. Not sure there was a hype about it, but my mate - Nick was not happy with it and claim GSC is still the best(i noe, i noe, it isn't fair). I was hoping that the second movie will be screening in a bigger hall after I watching the Gamer in the small 108 + 6 couple seat hall, but i end up in the same small screening hall. DAMN, I dun like the small hall, but until I get to try the big hall, I will not say GSC is better than MBO.

Michelle, Happy Belated Birthday, you're officially 21 now.

Uno, Ichi, yi, 1 , satu , one

I noticed that I have not blog about serious stuff for a long time. Is not like everything I post about lately is pure joke and for fun, but what I meant was I have not blog about serious topic that will eventually pissed people off. LOL

I m sure you come across number 1 a lot for the past few months. this number is almost certain to follow by the word Malaysia.

Unless you have been studying in Australia, UK, US, India, Russia and etc, and never thought of coming back to this miserable country, then I m pretty sure u know what is 1Malaysia.

To some, is a great idea. But idea is not always ideal for people to actually work it on.

To some, is a great policy. But how many successful policy the government have had for the last decade?

To some, is a great song name. Hence you turn on radio and kept hearing people singing 1Malaysia, 1 Negara, 1 Bangsa.

To me, is just a gimmick, a put on display for the people of Malaysia, to show them that the new government really want a harmony and unity nation. WTF?!?! Which country in the world doesn't want that?

Unity people is not as easy as launching a few poem writing, song composing competition or having a massive open house. It takes understanding and non-bias leadership to make it work. The unity of this country has been torn by its very own government for far too long, and is really sad for me to tell you the unavoidable truth: 1Malaysia is going to fail big time.

is just a matter of happy or not

A state of connectedness between people (especially an emotional connection), that's the definition for relationship.

I finished He's just not that into you (finally) today, is not as good as i expected it to be hence it take so many day for me to sit through it. After watching the movie, I have a very strong thought in my brain, a relationship is not measure by time, effort or money, it is measured by happiness. It is that simple and it make sense, you are happy when your relationship is going right and healthy, vice versa.

I'm not sure how many people out there would agree with me, but my point of view is simple and clear, if you have more tear than laughter in a relationship, i would rather not have that relationship. Of coz, you can not have joyous moment all the time, but..... well, you get the idea la, if you try and try and try and u failed, maybe u should just stop trying.

You might gain more by giving up something else.
You should love yourself enough so that you can give the extra love for others instead of hoping them to shower you with love.

I once thought that I m really stupid and selfless because of how much I give up to make a person happy. I was wrong, DEAD WRONG. I m doing it because I want that person to happy, is not stupid or selfless, is a sense of existing, it make me feel that because of my presence, that person is a bit more cheerful. I know sometime I do complicate thing for a bit but is not my intention to do so, I just want you to know that you look prettier when you smile.

I m not sure u think I m pure 38 or not la, but I really hope that you can stop having false hope in him, you can be still be very close with him without being his lover lo. Dun lut jor okay? I m not that bad wut.

I'm coming, I'm Coming, here i come weekend

Random Creep suddenly felt anxious and uneasy about tomolo's mid term. Not that the subject is tough and RC here are not prepare, but maybe the thought of knowing the next mid term after the one tomolo will be the very tough and time consuming RC design. RC here refer to REINFORCED CONCRETE.

So RC have to take on RC?!?! WTF?

Was it the promise to score GPA of 3.7 and above or finally the calling for greater achievement inside me have awake, I'm not sure but I just dun wan to do awfully bad in this period of my life. I wan to have a lil more control of my life.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Sometime, there are people around you that are really outstanding and attract you, thing can get a lil complicated if that person is of opposite gender and he/she show sign of affection for you too.

Is lot lot worst if you are those that easily developed feeling for a person and you are dreamy hopeful type. The more feeling you developed for him/her, the more HOPE you cast into the baloon, and even the biggest baloon have its own maximum capacity, I can't imagine how much it will hurt when the baloon burst and you end up inhale and exhaling like mad dog.

I'm actually much weaker than i thought I m, I'm a chicken. I thought I can be braver by loving you and I m dead wrong.

Love was such an easy game to play, sing The Beatles, little did they know love can be a bitch at times.

U r not missing it, but I do hope that you r appreciating that I never call or even msg u, I didn't forget all about you, I just care too much for you that I dun wan you to feel bad of something you have not done wrong in.

blog = update of my life

Had my first mid term of the semester, and it turn out to be a decent one. Was the first one who left the lecture hall, it makes me feel superior, lol. I gave up the theory part, but application question are alright. But the tougher part are yet to come.

Chatted with the Korean exchange student, found out that Korea practice Left Hand driving. OMFG, is the the biggest discover since I found out Miss Lim (a guy) is a bi.

Also found out that: is expensive to get a degree in Korea. Sun, the Korean student who is attending a public Uni in his country says that he need to pay the tuition fees of an equivalent of 6k in ringgit for every semester.

Check my body weight, and found out that I actually gain a kg, not sure was it the supper or the muscle i built up in gym. Other than the gym routine, now I'm playing the role as someone's alarm clock too, since I'm the one who says she have to lose some weight. I have to remind her to go for job in the evening.

Was worrying for a friend who blogged about her worry of falling into depression again. Sigh*, I can't do anything apart from being worried. I hope you get over it soon, I know is hard, but I believe you are a strong person. I have faith in you.

P.s: I m actually feeling hungry now, something is wrong with me.

What I like?

DL asked me that other day: Can you describe the characteristic of your dream gal?!

Just in case you dunno, DL has developed this ritual of having "talks" when he dun wan to prepare for upcoming exam. He will stay in the our room and start to ask all kind of question, lately he is even into this role playing of 'radio talk show host and caller'.

I'm not sure why or how, I have this huge thing for gals with dark skin. Not to the extent of Halle Berry dark, but just darker compare to normal Chinese complexion.

Height is never an issue, btw. But I know gal will never like to go out with a guy shorter than them, so i m guessing 170 and below shall make it better for my appearance, (I look taller by going out with a shorter gal, Haha)

Oh oh oh, and somehow I just love Blonde. I think is because the glittering of their hair? Lol.

DL: Which part of the body attract you?
Me: *Blush...* Ass, butt, bum, bottom, etc....

Another all time favorite question, long or short hair? - Would prefer short over long

This is for Michelle and her only, I love weirdo.

Last but not least, I madly love 38. Not just a bit 38, but super super 3-8.

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Omg, I think U have everything I want, that makes the MOVE ON part even much tougher.

P.s: If you match all the criteria above, and you are not in a relationship, on second thought, I'm okay with you having a bf, then you should leave ur contact here. Sorry guy, not in the mood of having a buddy now.